Wednesday, January 13, 2010

whisper to a scream to retreads that won't stop

Fuck Wes Craven and fuck Scream, in the 90's I will say that Slasher films did wear themselves out. I guess when you have exhausted every holiday or event that teens dance at, there is the sad truth you have played yourself and Wes Craven must have known his meal ticket named Freddy was becoming at first an icon and quickly devolving into a vaudeville comic that enjoyed murdering teens, most likely he did not like that children grew up and did not look as diddle-able and just as Freddy was able to use and manipulate his surrounding to entrap someone in a ironic demise, just like Catholics throwing their hats into subculture via music and film.

I will get back to that later, Scream was a wiping the slate of slasher films and Wes Craven knew if there was faces that are box office draws instead of no-names and women who have no problem taking their shirts off, now this has set off a tidal wave of giving second chances to recognizable faces. Do you really think real horror fans even give a shit about Tara Reid or Parris Hilton? Fuck no and don't try to repackage these hollywood assholes into cult figures, you can't give a person a blue streak in their hair and sell them as punk rock, did it work for the Germs by getting an actor to be Darby Crash? I bet alot of hipsters when to the show when the Germs came to town. Nowadays if you can't have certain feelings, you're in luck the internet allows you to track anything down and it has the potential to make everyone a little bit smarter. As always people prove me wrong, by still having a belief that Horror is not dead and sadly most people my age that do like Horror and don't mind remakes, are the same people who have pick-up trucks with flames on the side.

I once held the opinion that Troma films was a damn fine example of independent film could be, Troma suffered a fate not unlike placing a cigarette in a toilet for ten minutes and then pissing on said cigarette, yes it's still in there but its broken and waterlogged. Poultrygeist was Troma's first blu-ray and who the fuck cares? must be like listening to Suicidal Tendencies after they moved to One-side dummy records. Is there any reason to continue with Troma seeing they are just as important to independent film as Saturday Night live is to comedy.

Why have out of all the remakes done, Toolbox Murders which is one of the video nasties get remade? is it because any films off the nasties list were done today, you'd get an inferior product with predictable jump scares and a feeling that you've been cheated out of your money. The video nasties themselves were a group of films singled out by scared politicians and parents thinking bad things may happen if you watch a film like I spit on your grave, is it bad to kill the ones who rape you? no but some people would put their heads in a bible and ignore that the world is fucked up and violence is the only choice for some, in cases of rape I support revenge.

As for nasties, going out of your way to shock is a great way to make people afraid, Anthropophagous did a great job of that, just by having a scene of a baby getting ripped out of a woman and now hearing that you can picture so much and in truth it was done by shadow. Also known as Grim Reaper, its just your standard film about horny people getting killed by a man with a skin condition. Grim Reaper is just a plain fun but by the numbers film by Joe D'amato and if you like heads found in buckets this is your film.

I now stare at a list of the video nasties and I really cannot tie this all back together in a neat package, at the very least this will endup a sunset flip.

As always I will be found screaming about when horror was better, much like the lone blowhard found at the hangmans gallows trying to prevent a fate worse then death...Remakes.


Unholy Moly said...

looking at the photos of Poultrygeist I regret selling it i should just watch it with the commentary or the sound off maybe just scratched off the rap scenes all the vomit and zombie chickens make me happy

Chuckillz said...

Fat Boys and Freddy? Dj Jazzy Jeff and the Fresh Prince wrote a song titled "Nightmare On My Street" which is a pure Hip Hop Classic.


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