Highs and lows of horror

Revenge of the dead is one of those movies you find in the store and you say "ok it has a zombie on the cover" so you purchase it and you get home and it turns out to be a different film than the box art suggests and instead of chucking the film out the window, this may end up a favorite film of yours.

The story starts out with a old woman looking for someone outside during the nighttime, me I excel at putting two and two together and yes I correct about the old bag getting killed. Now before you bestow me with roses and praise, this film is the aim for all the fanfare. What happens next is a page from the fulci handbook,in the 1950's a young girl has a man take her to the basement and on the way to the basement, the house is doing the whole haunted act complete with the shaking Bannister gimmick. The man leaves the girl and something or someone has attacked the girl.

Now in present day, Stefano is a writer and he receives a typewriter from his girlfriend and he for some reason reads the ribbon from the typewriter and it tells of how the dead will rise and all that good stuff. Upon searching Stefano find out that belongs to Don Luigi and the mystery gets deeper when he goes to visit Don Luigi and talks to him and returning to talk again, the hero find that Don Luigi has been dead or missing for years.

Don Luigi was a priest until it was found he was studying K-zones place in the world that defy logic of life and death, meaning the dead will raise if placed in a K-zone. Stefano is getting sucked into to finding the truth and Bodies start piling up. Stefano's girlfriend is now calling him crazy for pursuing and the church that Don Luigi was a part of has Priests following Stefano.

Stefano finds the K-zone and locates the real Don Luigi and he is on camera while in a casket and there are devices that monitor that beep and boop and just look cool. Don Luigi wake up and starts laughing and come from the ground and tries to kill Stefano and but he gets away.

I won't say the end, but yet again it is Fulci-like and all around great even with a lack of gore and a low bodycount, Despite it seem you've seen parts of this film elsewhere it is a fun watch and the soundtrack rules! Buy this film just on the grounds on the actor has been in some of Argento's greatest films, you'll just want to watch Deep Red all over again!

Now for the low, Jess Franco. I can barely say his name without cringing and I know horror should push the limit but I tried to find worth Vampyros Lesbos. I watched it again and all I felt once again that Jess Franco is a one note filmmaker who makes films for perverts and horny teens, who else wants to see watered down avant garde with subpar camera angles and for some unknown reason his love of filming boats? Vampyros Lesbos has promise because of plot has to do with a woman getting sucked into a vampires life and this gets played out thought the dreams of a woman who seems crazy, now what ruins it for me is the overuse of the footage of the boats and a scorpion on the ground, and this images appear in the film over and over again. I am not sure what the subtext may be, maybe a fan of Misty Munday can explain my questions.

I will say watching Italian films of the past, I quite enjoy the beauty that alot of the women of these films, but do I need to see a topless woman waving her arms around topless at an odd angle for my entertainment? I seen other films to further blur the line of horror and porn, I just happen to find them terribly boring.

Vampyros Lesbos is a film you would watch if you want to shock your auntie, sad truth is getting though Vampyros Lesbos will just make you want to shove a boat up the ass of Jess Franco. Franco's body of work is just part of the reason that Horror fans are lumped into the weirdo pile and yes he has done some valid films, but I happen to think eatting beets in your salad is far more interesting than his body of work, at least your poop will be purple the next morning and thats more than I can say for Vampyros Lesbos.